>>þinky - þ ë g g ý

I’ve got a new blog..
Well, not new anymore actually..
Nevermind.. Just to promote promote sikit..

Come come come… Sini sini sini..
http://peggy.us.to/

I always thought that you are a guy I can rely on. A loving boyfriend.
But now I know, from the start till now, you are not. You can never be a loving boyfriend.
Every time I think bout all those things you said to ‘them’ i feel so sad..
So so sad that I cant control my tears. I don’t want you anymore.

sometimes, i just hate it..
i hate everything around me, i hate everyone around me including myself..
i just hate life.. life is so damn tough, i dont think i can manage to hold on sometimes..
why are you always making stupid promises..
do u know how much i hate it, how much i hate you?
hate till that i fell like killing myself so that i don have to listen to your fucking promises..
you are one big fat liar..
i hope so much that you are not in my life sometimes.. i’m suffering from youe torture..
can you spare me and let me go??
i’m having a fuck up life now.. my mom not giving me any money..
don like me to go to college and study, as if i’m doing something stupid..
hello? i’m studying, for goodness sake.. i’m not stealing..
and now, you are here, torturing me with your promises.. u r such a moron!!
i just hate u..

i hate this fucking world!!!
dad, u shdnt leave me alone in this god damn world..
u shd have bring me along and leave this world..
argh!! i hate!!

why you wannna act as if u care bout my feeling when u actually dont?
you dont care, i know it.. u never care how i feel.. if u did,things wont happen this way..
you are so selfish.. u only care bout urself..
if u like someone, u will try ur best to make her happy.. but u did not do tat..
so, what does this mean??
dont try to please me anymore.. no, dont do that, really.. bcoz its not from ur heart..
if u wanna make me happy, suprise me, u shd have done that long ago..
whats the point of making me happy, giving me siprises, only after i told u to do so??
everytime, u will promise me.. yes, at that particular time, u try to make me happy..
but after that?? u totally forget bout it..
everytime u make a promise, it means u hurt me one more time..
why do that to the 1 you love?? you said ypu love me, and yet, you are the 1 hurting me..
i am so dissapointed.. i never want to trust you again.. i never want to hear you talk, hear you say how you will do this and that for me.. bcoz you wont..
no matter what you do now, it juz make me feel that you are trying to win me back only, not that you are sorry for what you have done.. any words coming from your mouth, i dont trust..
once, u told me i always scolded you.. ok, i change.. i did not scold you, i let you make choices, i’ll just listen to what you say.. but, u take me for granted.. i have no faith in u anymore.. i doubt your love.. i doubt everything.. at this moment, i wanna be alone..
i dont wanna hear your voice, i dont wanna see you.. u hurt me so deeply, with all your broken promises..

there’s been a long time i last updated my blog.. and at last, there’s a feeling.. telling me 2 update dis blog..

feeling lazy 2day.. ponteng work.. went 2 ucsi and register.. damn, its expensive.. i’m not a rich girl.. sob..

hearing soppy love songs now.. make me feel sad.. i donno y..make me feel moody.. and feel like crying..

sometimes.. there’s things tat i want so much, but in the end.. i cant have it.. am i not clever enough on managing my own feelings.. or wat? or am i not thinking in a mature way?

sometimes i feel tat dis world is so unfair 2 me.. i always lost the 1 i love so much.. like…..my dad.. but compare to those who have no foods somewhere around da world.. i feel tat i’m lucky..

mayb i shouldnt ask 4 more.. i have a very loving bf.. n mayb tats enuf 4 me.. i donno.. something makes me sad.. but i donno wat..

well.. mayb i should juz leave all dis shit aside.. sometimes i feel tat life suckz.. but once again.. there’s some1 by my side, ready 2 cheer me up..

u lie to me.. u say u wan 2 weeks.. u liar.. y muz u lie to me.. i did ask u.. and now u say u dont want.. u promise to go out with me 4 da last time.. u r the 1 who chosse to be lidat.. why?? it may makes no difference 4 u, but there is difference 4 me.. i juz wanna see u 4 da last time, n go out wif u 4 da last time.. is it tat hard? u noe, i really cant let go.. even i’m sad, u wont care.. i really really really cant let go.. but y u forcing me to do so? it really hurts, u noe? i guess u will nvr noe.. memories… everything between u n me will only be memories.. i really try so hard to let go.. so hard.. couldnt really accept dis.. i regret telling u so early.. but i cant do anything now.. juz let go..

really do miss u… =’(

.::sadness::.

Really donno why is all dis things happening.. why is it this way? i don’t have a choice.. my only choice is to let go.. I wanna hold tight, but I cant.. really cant.. once I think of it, after 2 weekz, we wont be like last time anymore..cant be so happy with u.. cant see u anymore.. when u wont care 4 me anymore.. I’m really sad.. itz like sitting there n waiting it to go to an end.. u’ll nvr noe who I feel.. letting go some1 I like n cant do anything.. I nvr noe tat I will cry coz of u again.. I noe who u truly love.. I wont hope tat u’ll love me.. I’m happy enough tat u care 4 me and like me.. my feelings for u stays.. 4 how long, I donno.. I hope u n me can appreciate dis 2 weeks time.. n I really wanna go out wif u 4 da last time.. then I’ll let go by tat time.. I hope u can be happy 4 da rest of

ur

life.. rest more, don’t think too much.. not to smoke too.. plz.. n don’t do stupid things.. I don’t hope u do tat kind of things..

I love you!!!

i feel like crying sometimes.. i donno wat i should do.. i donno how to settle it.. i dont wanna hurt u.. but, i….cant control my feelings.. i noe how sad u r.. when u see da msg.. but, wat can i do? so, u think i should just end everything or wat? i’m confused.. i dont feel like it yet.. my feelings are still there? how? i’m very confused.. i’m very sad.. what should i do? plz tell me..

so long din post something in my bloggy jor.. something happen recently.. and i don like it.. i’ve done something very wrong.. i aint mature enough, playful n wat so ever.. aint good at handling my feelings.. i suckz.. why will i do such things n hurt the 1 i love so much.. make him feel so sad.. he trusted me so many times, and yet, i let him down again..i’m feeling very guilty.. i don like it dis way.. wat can i really do? i juz hope that he can 4give me, 4 making him so sad n miserable.. i juz wan to say sorry..

sorry darling!!

Hey! Itz been a long long time since i last post something in my bloggy..

it was like…years.. man, i’m so stress.. With those results coming back, and that SPM coming to my way.. dont even dare to think bout it.. wondering what kind of results will i be getting.. once i think bout it, let donno how many days more till 14th November, i’ll fell like throwing things and like ‘damn it’..

why do i need to get good results 4 those exam? why cant i juz relax at home, without any stupid exam.. getting bad results really sux.. and i hate it.. especially when i did study or i dont even noe wat i’m studying..

but no matter what, i’ll try my very very best to score 4 my last exam.. i really hope to prove to ppl out there, don u ever look down on me.. i’m much better than u are.. (sure muz got some confidence ma) haha.. XD

daddy, i still remember what i promise u.. and i hope i cant show u.. and of coz, not 2 let my mummy down also.. i think she’s really boring of me getting sure bad results.. but hey! i’m improving.. ya noe?

anyway.. to ppl out there.. who’s havin SPM.. good luck 2 u guyz.. hope that every1 will get good results.. (i wonder how many ppl will ever read my blog)hehe.. bye.. muakz..

-peggy-